The Lightness of B

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"But I'm trying, Ringo. I'm trying real hard to be the shepherd."

Wednesday, November 19, 2008

Hazy Shade of Winter

I love the cold.

It’s strange, because most people I know dislike winter. They’re summer people. I guess living in TN you have to be, because once summer hits, it’s HOT and you’d better be ready. But I hate the heat the way most people dislike the cold.

There’s this thing called seasonal affective disorder, where you get depressed (either slightly or majorly) in the winter. Less sunlight, less time spent outside…it psychologically gets to people. Some people it affects more than others, but I know plenty of folks who are just happier in the summer than winter.

But there’s a SAD for summer as well. Not depression, but you sleep less, eat less, even suffer from anxiety in extreme cases. Basically, it’s restlessness. I feel that, and once the cold months move in, it just feels like things slow down. And I relax.

I was always this way. When I was a kid, I went outside just as much during the winter as I did in the summer. Maybe more. I loved the cold, snow or no snow (and in south east TN, it was usually “no snow”).

And it’s still the same now. Take Monday evening, for example: I left work and it felt just like winter. It was cold, but the wind wasn’t blowing. Snow was falling, gently, adding to the blanket already on the ground. The sky was grey, and the sun was already setting behind the clouds. Everything was quiet and still. No one was out. Those days feel like the world is wrapped in a blanket, like time is standing still. I left my gloves in my bag so I could feel the cold on my skin. I breathed in the chilly air, filling my lungs, and sighed, content. Being in love with winter is like being part of a secret not everyone understands.

Maybe that’s what I like best about it.